Are you there?

Yes, we are here.

Today, I would like to continue our discussion on addictive behavior by focusing on those instances where addictions re-assert themselves.

Is there a specific personal experience that you would like to share with our readers?

Yes. During a recent vacation, I decided that I really wanted to relax and enjoy myself. Fully aware that in the past I periodically binged on foods containing processed sugar, I put aside my usual dietary discipline and allowed myself to satisfy my cravings by purchasing two “family size” bags of peanut M&Ms as well an assortment of cookies, donuts and ice cream. Aside from some minor guilt feelings, I enjoyed these foods while I was eating them and told myself that it was perfectly fine and that I had been working hard lately and deserved to indulge myself. However, after a few days of gorging myself on M&Ms and other sweets, I discovered, not unexpectedly, that I was not feeling particularly good. I was not sleeping well. I was becoming cranky and irritable. And my feelings of guilt were starting to escalate.

And did you take any action to address these feelings or your behavior?

No, I just kept right on eating. After a while, I not only felt bad physically, but I still kept telling myself that it was OK to indulge myself by eating those things I enjoy, regardless of the physical consequences.

And when you say “OK to indulge,” what you really mean is “overindulge,” do you not? Overindulging in a compulsive, almost obsessive manner?

Yes, you’re right. But that’s where it gets tricky, because once you start indulging, or overindulging, as you say, it’s very hard to stop, especially if it is part of an old behavioral pattern. The question, then, is how to make a better choice in a situation like this without feeling like you are depriving yourself?

We cannot tell you which choice to make. That is something that only you can decide. What we can do is point you in the right direction by suggesting that first, you must decide where your priorities lie. What is more important to you – overindulging in your craving for sugar or respecting your physical form by keeping your diet as healthy as it can be? We make no judgements either way, but we might suggest that if you cannot decide, that you might listen to what your body has to say on the subject. It would seem to us that, in this case, your body was telling you that excessive sugar in your diet is no longer your best choice. That over time, your body has formed new preferences in terms of what it wants and what it does not want. And it would seem as if too much sugar is no longer its preference. That is why you felt bad physically after consuming so much sugar. Your body was only affirming your own commitment by sending you a message. “Please! No more sugar!”

That’s all very well and good, until the ego steps in and responds by saying, “Relax. You’re on vacation. Eat what you want. Do what you want. It’s just for a week. Allow yourself the freedom to really enjoy yourself.”

We would never tell you not to enjoy yourself. That would run counter to all that we have said to you so far in our conversations. But if you feel you are not capable of consuming processed sugar in moderation without overindulging, then perhaps it would be best to stick by your commitment to making healthier dietary choices. If you see this as depriving yourself of pleasure, which you are not feeling in any event, then perhaps you need to take a closer look at what your ego is telling you about pleasure and diet and how they are connected.

Yes, that makes sense.

Next time try saying say to yourself, “That choice, eating all of that sugar, is not a healthy choice for me. When I make that kind of choice, I do not feel good – physically, mentally or emotionally. So instead, I will make a choice that serves me better. I will make a choice that feels good to me. I will make a choice that maintains my connection to the loving energy of Source.” Reminding yourself that feeling good, feeling healthy, is your priority will help in any situation where you have difficulty making these kinds of choices.

Part of the problem is that the old behavior, which used to feel so good, but no longer does, is trying to reassert itself, and that can be difficult to resist.

That is because the ego uses your addictive impulses to keep you disconnected from who you really are. With addictive behavior, as with any choice that you are making regarding your behavioral experience, you are always looking for something, anything, that will make you feel good. That is where the sights of your higher self are always positioned. The trick is in making the distinction between that which makes you feel good and that which satisfies a compulsive craving held in place by the ego.

Yes, of course. The ego, always causing trouble, always thwarting our best intentions.

And yet, ultimately, it is you and not the ego that is making the choice. That is what you need to understand. Blaming the ego for all of your ills solves nothing if you do not take the opportunity to step up and take responsibility for your own decisions, your own actions. That is what you are here to do. In this situation, you were confronted by the need to make a choice. How you felt afterwards depended on your intention behind that choice and your commitment to that intention.

I want to take responsibility for the choices I make. But how do I know if I’m making the right choice for me?

By how you feel. Always, ALWAYS, by how you feel. That is your gauge, that is your guide, that is your barometer as to what will ultimately keep you aligned with Source and maintain your access to well-being and what will not. It all hinges on how you feel.

This is been very helpful. I think we will stop there for today.

Of course. Until next time.

Thank you all.

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