Are you there?

Yes, we are here.

In our last two posts on pain and illness, we discussed the importance of looking inside ourselves for the emotional imbalances or blockages that might be the cause of our condition and for the belief systems that may inform the type of pain or illness that we’re experiencing. Once we begin to experience pain or illness in our body, though, how are we supposed to identify and sort through all of the emotional blockage that is causing our condition? Is it even necessary for us to know where pain or illness is coming from for us to achieve some kind of healing?

It is not necessary for you to know the origin of every condition that you are experiencing within your physical form for healing to take place. Sometimes it is not even possible for your conscious mind to grasp the entirety of a situation of this nature. What is most important is that you address your feelings, that you maintain your awareness and understanding of what is happening in your life, and that you do your best to keep your energy field as clear and as grounded as possible. Daily meditation, especially guided meditation, is one way to keep your system free of lingering, low-vibrational emotional energies. We would also recommend maintaining an ongoing dialogue with your body about whatever physical circumstances you find yourself in. After all, it is your physical form that most directly experiences pain or illness, so it is in the best position to help you understand and alleviate any unwanted conditions. If you remain in close contact with your physical form and continue to stay open to whatever information you may receive, often the source of your pain or illness will make itself known to you. We might also suggest reaching out to Source or to the Universe or to any of the angels or guides from whom you may seek guidance. A simple request for clarity and assistance is often all that is needed, although the answer may not always come in a form that you expect. You may overhear someone talking about pain or emotion, or you might read something, or even hear something on a television program, something that might resonate with you in a way that causes you to say to yourself, “Yes, that is it! That is the answer I have been seeking.” If it feels right to you in the moment, often times it is. You just need to trust yourself and the benevolent Universe, which desires only that which is best for you.

But what if that moment of revelation, that moment of ‘Yes, that’s it!” never arrives? What if you reach out, to your body, to the Universe, to your guides and angels, but all you hear in return is silence? What if instead you start to feel as if you’ve been abandoned, cut off, that no help is coming, and that you’re destined to experience these recurring patterns of pain and illness off and on for the rest of your life? This is how I started to feel at first during this episode with my back, that I had no control over the situation and that I was caught in a never-ending cycle of pain that would never heal. Then I remembered something you said in one of our recent conversations, the one about Growth and Progress. You said: “There have been many times in the recent past where you were completely convinced that you were moving backwards and regressing, experiencing old behaviors and emotions that you were convinced had been released long ago. In actuality, your system was allowing you to move forward more easily by releasing old, entrenched energies that no longer served you. A challenging experience for you, but a sign of growth and progress nonetheless.” It was hard, but while I was dealing with my back pain, I tried to keep this idea in mind, that maybe behind all of this pain there was something of value, something that I could appreciate, that the pain was a sign that I was finally letting go of some of the old, entrenched emotional patterns that no longer served me, patterns that were now incompatible with my rising vibration, and that on some level, as difficult as it might be for me to understand and accept, that all of the pain I was experiencing was actually a good thing, and that by releasing these low-vibrational emotional energies, my system was actually allowing me to do what I came here to do – to move forward, to grow and expand, and in the process, move closer to fully remembering who I really am.

Perhaps you would like to share with our readers the experience that followed the easing of your physical pain.

Yes, of course. In many ways, that was the most significant part of the whole experience. After the pain in my back finally began to subside, I started to become very emotional. Crying a lot mostly. And I mean really crying. Sobbing uncontrollably, five, ten, twenty minutes at a stretch, sometimes until I became so exhausted that I had to force myself to stop. It felt like a bottomless pit of emotion, one that showed no signs of ending. I warned my friends before I saw them not to pay any attention if I suddenly burst into tears, but that didn’t really work. “Oh, my God! Are you OK? You seem so depressed. Did something happen? Oh, dear, are you crying? I’m so sorry!” After a while, I thought it best to simply avoid people until all of this emotion had subsided.

And at the time were you aware of the cause of this ongoing emotional release?

No, at least not at first. I actually thought I was falling into an extended period of depression, although to be honest, my past depressions never involved a lot of weeping. It took about a week before I connected the intense pain in my body with the bouts of crying. Seems obvious to me now, but at the time, I was so caught up in the emotion that I didn’t associate one with the other. Once I made the connection, though, things got a little easier. I was less afraid, for one thing. Less afraid of what I was experiencing. When you’re crying all day non-stop, you start to think after a while that maybe you’re going crazy. But once I made the connection, I relaxed and just allowed myself to cry as much as a I wanted, for however long it took. I realized after a while that the crying needed to happen, that it was a release of the emotion that had built up in my system, the same blocked and repressed emotion that had caused the intense pain in my body. I’d been holding onto it, but once the physical pain had been relieved by my chiropractor, the floodgates opened and all the emotion came pouring out, emotion as intense as the pain in my body.

And did you discover the source of this emotion that you had been storing up in your energy field?

Yes, I did, although not intentionally. It just sort of happened. And it was very surprising. I just started paying close attention to what I was thinking about during these crying episodes and soon it was clear to me that I was crying for myself, crying for all of the missed opportunities in my life. All of the failures. All of the regrets. All of the self-criticism that I’d left unprocessed, unaddressed, lingering in my energy field. And some of these regrets, some of these perceived failures, went back years and years, to high school, to elementary school, to my early childhood. Instances where I felt I had let myself down, where I had not met my potential, where I had failed. There was a lot of thinking about my present circumstances, too. Here I was retired, with all of this free time on my hands, and what was I doing with it? Nothing much. At least that’s what I kept telling myself. Nothing much at all. Just wasting my time. These were the kinds of thoughts that were flowing through my head while all of this crying was going on. And the triggers, they were almost exclusively thoughts about people enjoying their lives, being happy and joyful, most especially those who were succeeding at what they were doing, even down to an actor on a sitcom getting a laugh for telling a joke. The most surprising part was that I had no idea that any of this was stored up inside of me. I thought I was doing fine. I thought I’d handled all of my past regrets very well. I didn’t even think I had any past regrets. But I was wrong. They were there, stored up, waiting to be released. Unfortunately, when you’ve let all of that emotion build up in your system like that, you need to experience it all over again in order for it to be released. I think that’s a big reason why so many people choose to hang on to all of that repressed emotion rather than find a way to release it. I guess in my case, despite my own impulses to keep it all inside, I’d finally reached a point, perhaps because of the work that we’ve been doing together, where my personal vibration had reached a certain level and my system could no longer tolerate this repressed emotional energy. It was no longer compatible with my higher vibrational frequency and so it had to go, one way or another. And if the emotion was buried so deeply that I could not reach it, was not aware of it, then my system was going to make me aware of it, and that, I believe, is how the pain in my body came to be.

Indeed. In retrospect, you can see how this episode of physical pain, although very challenging for you at the time, led to something that was truly miraculous in its way – your vibration rose and years of repressed emotional energy, energy that was now incompatible with your current state, was released.

Sounds very simple when you put it like that, but at the time, it was a nightmare. But ultimately, with the release of the pain, came forgiveness, self-forgiveness, and that, too, surprised me, because I was not expecting that at all. I felt as if I had been through so much during those few months with the pain, both physical and emotional, that I was just happy and relieved that it was all over. And then, without any effort on my part, I began to feel this incredible sense of forgiveness, for all of the things that I thought I had done, or not done, in my past, in my present, as if forgiving myself was the natural result, the inevitable outcome of everything I’d been through. That the entire experience was designed with just this result in mind, right from the start.

As you have discovered, it is not unusual for the release of repressed emotion to lead you to forgiveness of self. Indeed, this is what the process of healing is all about. And this is why it is so important to forgive yourself as you move along your journey rather than waiting until the emotional energy builds up and forces you to deal with it. Most importantly, it is through forgiveness that the dust finally settles, so to speak, and you come to see more clearly who you really are. You can begin finally to see yourself as whole, as healthy, as healed. Which is as is should be, for your natural state is one of perfect health and well-being. In your case, after all of your pain and suffering, you emerged from the challenges that you set for yourself stronger, healthier and more in touch with who you really are. After this, there was only one further step for you to take.

And what step would that be?

Sharing your story, which you have just done.

Of course. Sharing my story, which, as you say, I’ve just done. What I’d like to do is continue our discussion on pain for at least one more post where we can share some of the ways to alleviate physical pain and find some healing relief.

We look forward to assisting you with that discussion. Until next time then.

Thank you all.

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