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Yes, we are here.

Today, I want to talk about complaining.

The inclination among human persons to complain about those things that do not please you, that irritate and frustrate you, that make you feel “less than,” has been around almost as long as the physical plane has been in existence. It is a class of addictive thought patterning that has dominated human consciousness for many thousands of years.

And because it has been so dominant for so long, it seems almost impossible to avoid. At the risk of complaining too much about complaining, it seems that no matter what or who we are talking about, or even what we are thinking about, it always seems to end with complaints of one sort or another. We humans have become so used to complaining, both to others and to ourselves within our own minds, that we are often not aware of it.

In terms of energetic frequency, complaining is the polar opposite of appreciation. And as we have discussed previously, the vibration of appreciation is perhaps the closest human expression to that of Source energy. So, it naturally follows that complaining, even when you are conscious of it, lowers your naturally high emotional vibration and keeps you from remembering who you really are. How can you possibly be a powerful, highly-developed being of love and light if there is so much in your life that you feel the need to complain about?

And yet, ironically, we humans somehow believe that complaining empowers us, even though it comes from a very insecure place within us. If we were in touch with who we really are and felt our own personal power and strength more readily, we would not need to complain about anything, would we? Instead, we can’t seem to work through our personal issues without feeling the need to blame someone else.

That would involve taking full responsibility for your actions, your choices and your decisions, as well as acknowledging that whatever you experience is of your own creation. Instead, you act upon your own unhappiness and frustration by reinforcing your victim identity. Seeing yourself as the victim is considered a much safer, easier choice than taking responsibility for your experiences and that is why complaining is so addictive. It brings with it a misguided, distorted sense of self-satisfaction.

Yes. That’s true. Some people actually seem to benefit from complaining. They believe that it helps to release pent-up emotions like anger and frustration that might not otherwise find release.

To those who find that complaining helps to release stored negative emotions, we would recommend releasing these emotions without acting them out publicly. Instead, find a friend or loved one with a sympathetic ear, someone who is willing and able to listen with detachment. Even better, write your complaints down on paper in something like a meditation journal. In that way, you avoid spreading negative vibrations to those who are in close proximity to you, for that is a choice that serves no one.

Being in the presence of someone who is constantly complaining can be very draining.

There are a number of ways you can protect your own energy field when you find yourself in the path of unsolicited complaining. One is to share your feelings with the complainer. That might not always be easy, especially if the complainer is a close friend or relative, but it can be very effective. Simply be honest and tell them that, while you understand their situation, you would prefer to talk about something else. Then change the subject. Another choice is to remove yourself physically from the line of fire. This may not always be possible, but if you can manage it, this approach can also be very effective. What you do NOT want to do when in the presence of a complainer is to allow their complaining to trigger your own.

Yes, that’s what happens to me. I don’t want to listen to someone else complain, but rather than say something, I begin a rant of my own. Even when I manage to avoid that, I tend to slip into a cycle of complaining inside my own head.

If you notice that you are complaining to yourself within your own mind, stop immediately and engage yourself in another activity. Read a book, sing a song, cook some food. Anything to distract your mind and shift your focus.

It can be challenging to make that kind of shift. Once you start complaining, it’s difficult to stop. It’s like a bottomless pit. There always seems to be something else to complain about.

The next time your complaining is triggered by someone or something, look for something positive to focus on about that person or situation and keep your attention on it. Eventually, your thoughts will begin to shift on their own and you will begin to feel some relief. As always, it is important to allow yourself to become aware of what you are doing and what you are saying and what you are thinking from moment to moment. That is how things are brought to the surface, how you bring light to the darkness, how you heal yourself. Your conscious awareness IS the light. By becoming aware and remaining positive, you bring light and love to any and all situations, no matter how troubling they may be.

But that raises another issue, doesn’t it? The ego. Try as we might, sometimes in situations like this it feels almost impossible to avoid ego resistance to allowing our own awareness to surface.

Complaining is a way for the human ego to do what it does best – create the illusion of power while perpetuating instability and drama. Your ego wants you to remain enmeshed in whatever conflict is at hand because that is what keeps it alive. And nothing satisfies the ego more than a situation where you perceive yourself to be taken advantage of, put upon, disregarded, under-appreciated, powerless, even outright aggressed and abused. That is why complaining as a way of releasing lower vibrational emotional energy is not the most efficient or most effective choice, because it has a self-perpetuating momentum that feeds on itself. The more you complain about something, the more you attract the situation that is causing you to complain. It’s a circular problem that can only be solved by making another choice.

That is a lot to think about. I hope we can revisit this topic at a future time.

Yes, indeed. Until next time.

Thank you all.

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