Are you there?

Yes, we are here.

Today I would like to talk in general about the emotional choices we make as humans.

There seems to be a certain theme lately to your choice of topics.

How so?

In our last few posts, we talked about complaining, then about anger and frustration, and then about worry and concern. You seem very focused these days on what we refer to as low-vibrational emotional states.

I hadn’t thought about that, but I guess you’re right. I just want a better understanding of these kinds of emotional states, in part because they seem to be more present in our lives than, say, happiness or joy or appreciation. They seem to be our default emotional choice so much of the time. And while we have already discussed some of the reasons behind this, I’d like to explore them a bit further.

Of course. That is completely understandable. These low vibrational states, all variations of fear, as we have said before, predominate the human mind courtesy of the ego. They form a very tight structure within your consciousness, which is why it is so hard to move past them and release them completely. Together, these low vibrational stages form the essence and the force of the ego mindset. They stick together, and the energy of one of these low-frequency emotions can trigger the onset of another emotion very much like it, and before you know it, you are in the middle of an emotional avalanche.

I guess all I’m trying to do is bring some of my own awareness to these emotional states, to understand them a bit more, and in the process, come to realize fully that when it comes to emotion, we have a choice. That is a difficult idea to accept.

In part, because the human mind makes choices very quickly and often there is so little time between an event and your emotional response to it that it feels almost as if your emotions are just happening to you, that you have no real control over them. “Sorry I got so mad, but that’s just the way I am” or “I don’t want to be jealous, but I just can’t help myself.” We can assure you without a doubt that each and every one of your emotional responses is a choice. Your choice. And that these choices do not happen because you have a particular kind of personality or because you can’t help yourself or because someone else is making you feel a certain way. They are your choices and your responsibility. You simply have not yet remembered that you have the power to control them.

It also seems to me that we respond a great deal out of habit. Yes, the responses are quick and that makes awareness difficult, but it’s also easier for us to just respond out of habit. That way we do not have to take full responsibility for our emotions. They are things that just happen to us.

Many human emotional responses are based on choices that you have made in the past. Almost all, if we are to be quite accurate. Humans have not yet achieved a state where each and every response is allowed to take place in the present moment, without reference to any past responses. When you are confronted by an individual or a situation that draws an emotional response from you, the first thing that happens is that your mind judges the event against similar events that have happened in the past. “How did I respond the last time this happened, and the time before that, and the time before that?” Generally, these kinds of calculations happen so quickly that your conscious mind is not aware of them. That is why it is so important to always remain in the moment. Only when you are in the moment can you really respond in a truly spontaneous way. Otherwise, you are simply repeating your emotional past over and over again.

So, what can we do to stay present and become more aware of the emotional choices we are making?

To begin with, slow yourself down. Human minds are moving faster than ever before, and the faster they move, the harder it is for humans to monitor the emotional choices they are making. So, use whatever tools you can to slow down. Meditation is an excellent way to become more aware of your thought processes. Meditation will also help you to slow your thinking down so that you can actually see the process unfolding when you are in an emotional situation. Conscious breathing is another excellent way to keep yourself in the present moment. This is very important in highly-emotional situations where your ego will try to pull you out of the present and have you respond as you might have in similar situations in the past. Your point of power is always in the present, so you need to do everything you can to remain focused there. Both of these tools – meditation and conscious breathing – will allow you to become more aware of the emotional choices that you are making.

What else?

Pay close attention to how you are responding in certain situations. Do your best to gauge your responses. Am I over-reacting to this situation? Am I really upset or do I just think I should be upset? How do others expect me to respond? Are there other ways I could be responding? How similar is this situation to others from my past where I have responded in exactly the same way? Is it really possible for me to make another choice in this situation? If so, what might that choice be?

But won’t constant monitoring destroy our emotional spontaneity in a given situation? Won’t we start judging the choices we are making?

You already do that. Judge your emotional responses. And while your choices may seem spontaneous and “in the moment,” often times they are not. As you yourself have pointed out, they are frequently chosen out of habit. So, why not allow yourself the time and space to increase your awareness of how you operate emotionally in the world? While examining your emotional responses may seem awkward or intrusive at first, eventually you will acquire the ability to respond naturally and spontaneously in the moment without judgement and with conscious awareness of the emotional choices that you are making.

I think we will stop there for today.

Of course. We look forward to our next discussion.

Thank you all.

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