WHERE WE DISCUSS ADDICTION TO THOUGHT
Are you there?
Yes, we are here.
We have talked in the past about addictive behaviors, as well as the power and influence that the ego holds over our everyday lies, but we have not spoken specifically about the addictive nature of the ego and the stream of thinking it produces. Today, I would like to address that issue in more detail.
Addiction to thought is possibly the most common type of addictive behavior that human persons encounter on a daily, almost moment-to-moment basis. It is ever-present and pervasive, something that all human persons experience to one degree or another regardless of who they are or how far they have evolved spiritually. Indeed, we would say that at the heart of every other type of addictive behavior that humans exhibit lies addiction to the mental chatter of the ego.
In general, how would you describe the nature of addiction?
Addiction is something akin to a magnetic force, an undeniable pull towards behavior that can be, in the moment, immersive, all-consuming and sometimes self-destructive. Individuals who experience addictive behaviors – and that would include almost every human person on your planet – often feel as if they have no control whatsoever over the impulses that lead to the behavior, as if their own free will has been suspended and the impulse itself is in charge of any and all choices that are being made. That despite their best intentions, when in the throes of such a compulsion, they feel almost compelled beyond reason to surrender to the gratification that they believe they will achieve by allowing the impulse to take hold.
What is this gratification that we believe we will gain from addictive behavior?
Generally, an addiction grows out of attempts to assuage the fears and insecurities that have formed over the course of one’s life. For example, some may have been told during the course of their childhood that they are not good enough, leading to a belief that they do not deserve any happiness in their lives. This is a very common and widespread belief among human persons. Some might try to compensate for this belief by overachieving, seeking to offset feelings of inadequacy with a false sense of accomplishment; others might try to block out these thoughts and feelings, thinking that if they can distract themselves with some kind of action, they will drown out or at least soften their mental and emotional pain. Because these coping mechanisms do not actually address the actual cause of their emotional discomfort, the end result is often a dependence on some form of addictive behavior that is used repeatedly as a coping mechanism.
What, then, is the actual cause of the emotional discomfort?
Identification with and dependence upon the thought processes of the ego. That is where all addictive behaviors start and how they are sustained. By the compulsion on the part of humans to listen to and believe whatever their mind is telling them. This identification with the ego is so strong among humans that, almost from the start, thought generated by the ego becomes the way in which you define your world, how you label those things and people you come in contact with, how you judge them, compare them, and ultimately how you experience them. It could be said that humans do not so much experience the world in which they live as experience THEIR THOUGHTS ABOUT the world in which they live. Because thought is such a constant, unchecked presence in most people’s lives, it becomes second nature to rely upon one’s stream of thinking to define one’s experiences. It is in this way that mental chatter exerts its deeper addictive nature.
In observing my own behavior, I’m starting to see how my reliance on thought to define my world affects my behavior. One example is my ongoing compulsion to visit news websites that contain information that more often than not only succeeds in either depressing me or making me angry. I can see now, when I stop to take a moment and observe, that the impulse to visit these sites is often triggered by a need to find something that will make me feel good about myself by validating my world view, either by affirming that point of view or by disproving or discrediting the opposing point of view. I go back to these sites over and over again to calm my own insecurities, my own fears, and yet, ironically, I almost always come away with my attention fixated on those news items or stories that stand in opposition to my world view. Those are the ones that I tend to remember. And those are the ones that I tend to think about and obsess over.
And why do you think that is?
My guess is that it’s because the ego enjoys that type of imbalance, that type of insecurity, and will seek to sustain it by continuing to draw me back to those sites with its constant negative chatter. “What is happening in this world? I can’t understand how people can believe these things. Are they delusional? I’d better go back in today and check and make sure these crazy people have not taken over the world!” We can’t seem to stop trying to alleviate the anxiety caused by this kind of chatter. Whatever behavior we find that can offer some relief, we repeat it over and over again until it eventually becomes an addiction.
As we have said many times before, the ego is comprised of fear-based belief systems that you have formed over the course of your lifetime, and the ego will do everything in its power to sustain those systems because they represent its life blood, its reason for being. The addictive behaviors that arise from this type of dynamic are just another way for the ego to maintain its control over your everyday behavior.
The obvious question then is how do we handle this type of mental addiction, this compulsion to listen to what our minds are telling us and to believe everything that we hear, regardless of how much it interferes with our daily lives or how detrimental it might be to our mental health.
As with all things related to your remembering who you really are and why you have come, the first place to start is with your own awareness. You may not believe it, but the fact that we can have this conversation about the existence of mental chatter is a big step forward on your journey towards remembrance. Many human persons are not even aware that there is a constant stream of thought that flows through their minds at all times. They may be aware of it at certain times when the thinking becomes too loud to ignore or the emotions that it triggers become overly intense. Sometimes, awareness comes through the form of story-telling from one person to another. “And then what happened?” “Well, I thought to myself, ‘Why should I just sit there and say nothing?’ I thought ‘Who does he think he is? I don’t have to put up with this. I deserve better.’ So I got up to give him a piece of my mind and then I thought, “No, better not. I’ll just get myself fired.” But even in cases such as this, there is seldom any conscious recognition of a direct connection between the experience itself and the thought process that created it. That is why awareness is so important. Slowing down the mind, taking the time to hear what your mind is saying, allowing yourself some distance between yourself – and by yourself we mean your true self, the deep awareness, the presence that comprises who you really are – and the ego’s chatter. That is where you need to begin in order to recognize who you really are and who you really are not. That is the path to true freedom.
In other words, I am not my ego. I am not the mental chatter that the ego generates. I only believe that because that is what I have been taught, that is what I have observed in others as I was growing up and that is what I observe in pretty much every person I come in contact with. We all identify strongly with our egos and the thoughts we hear and that’s how we interact with our world. Through thought. And it is only by re-identifying with our true selves, with our own deep quiet stillness, that our compulsion to listen to and believe what we hear from the ego can subside and ultimately disappear.
Indeed. That is why you have come after all. To recognize the ego for what it is – NOT YOU – and to realize that there is another part of you, the inner part, the loving, the compassionate, the still and peaceful presence, that represents your true nature.
I think we will stop there for today. But next time, I would like to continue this discussion and explore with you some of the ways in which we can facilitate this dis-identification with the ego while shifting our identification back to our true selves.
It will be our pleasure. Until next time.
Thank you all.
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