Are you there?

Yes, we are here.

Today, I’d like to continue our discussion on criticism, but this time I’d like to focus on our criticism of others.

How would you like to proceed?

Last time, we talked about how self-critical comments often stem from our own insecurities, from our lack of self-esteem, from the fact that we are often completely out of touch with our own personal power. When we are critical of others, there also seems to be a lot of anger, resentment and jealousy driving those comments, along with a need to feel superior because our own self-esteem is so low.

There is an idea held by many human persons that these low-vibrational emotional states, when acted upon, will make you feel more powerful. While they can energize you to some degree, what you ultimately experience – the false sense of superiority, the smug self-satisfaction, the feeling of self-righteousness – these states do not last and have no real substance. Love is and always has been the source of your true sense of power. Sustained power through fear is nothing more than an illusion.

In other words, you can never really completely compensate for your own perceived lack of self-esteem by condemning or criticizing someone else. It may make you feel better temporarily, but in the long run, it will not improve the way you feel about yourself. And when such criticism is spoken aloud to another person, you only succeed in making them feel bad about themselves. You’d like to think that criticizing someone else to their face doesn’t matter, that they deserve to feel bad about themselves because of the way they are acting, but in the end, it’s not very satisfying and rarely makes you feel any better about yourself.

Exactly. And given how the Law of Attraction works, not only will you continue to feel less than good about yourself, but you will also continue to attract into your life individuals and circumstances that will trigger your criticism. It is a vicious cycle that can only be healed by increasing your awareness and making another choice.

Right. So, how do we increase our awareness?

As the tendency to criticize others stems ultimately from a state of fear, you might ask yourself “What do I really have to fear? Is what I am trying to fend off so frightening, so much of a threat? Is it not possible that what I fear lies more within my own mind that in any kind of reality?”

Well, that makes sense. If we can remain centered within ourselves and stay present, we might discover that all of the fear that drives criticism of others is actually self-generated.

Which brings us to another important element to bear in mind when it comes to criticism of others and that is projection.

What exactly is projection?

Think of the physical world as a gigantic mirror. Everything that you think or believe about yourself is reflected back to you by the physical world. That includes those things about yourself that you do not like. In a real sense, those things about others that bother you, irritate you, frustrate you, anger you, generally those are nothing more than projections of the things about yourself that you do not like, that you consider “bad” or “wrong.” You do not want to acknowledge or take responsibility for those qualities, so you project them out onto others, allowing you to criticize them without having to fully accept them. “She’s always so smug.” or “Why is he so mean?” or “What a dope!” The next time you find yourself making these types of comments about others, turn it around and substitute yourself. “I’m always so smug” “Why am I so mean?” “I’m such a dope!” You can learn a great deal about the way you see yourself by simply monitoring the critical thoughts you hold about others. You will soon discover that criticism of others is simply another way of criticizing yourself.

That makes a lot of sense, but I can already feel resistance to that idea.

Of course. That is only natural. No one wants to acknowledge their own perceived faults, especially when your ego is working overtime to make sure you believe that those things that you dislike about yourself are actually a part of someone else’s personality. But using the physical world as a mirror is a great tool for increasing your own self-awareness, and it is right there for you to use whenever you need it.

Is there anything else you would like to add?

One more thing you can do, and that is to ask yourself “If what I fear about myself or about another is nothing more than a self-generated state within my own mind, a set of beliefs about what is expected of me, about what I expect of others, about what is considered right and good and proper, then is it not possible for that state, that set of beliefs, to change? And if so, how? How can I make that change?” These questions can be applied to not only the impulse to criticize, but to any and all of the lower-vibrational states that you wish to alter, that you wish to pivot away from to a higher, more loving vibrational state. At the risk of repeating ourselves too often, this is your work. To shift, to pivot, to look at something, say, something that you criticize for being too much of one thing or not enough of another, something that you see in yourself or in another human person, and find a way to look past your judgement, past your prejudice, and allow yourself to see your own loving spirit reflected back to you. That is the direction you want to move in. That is the place that we are guiding you towards. So that is where you must fix your sights. On love. Always on love.

I think we’ll stop there for today. This discussion about criticism, both of self and others, has been very helpful.

As always, it has been our pleasure.

Thank you all.

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