WHERE WE TALK ABOUT VALUING THE SELF
Are you there?
Yes, we are here.
Today, I’d like to revisit a topic we’ve covered before on many occasions – the issue of self-worth, of valuing the self. It seems to be such a tenuous thing, our feelings of self-worth. Hard to get a hold of and even harder to maintain our grasp once we do. Our value in the world seems to be so dependent upon what others think of us that it’s very hard to believe that we’re actually the ones who decide our own self-worth, our own value in the world.
The value you feel is the value that you give yourself, that you discover within yourself. Others can help to point the way, but ultimately, it is up to you. As humans, you often seek your value outside of yourself, but as you are beginning to discover, your real value, your true value, is grounded in the essence of Source, the essence of who you really are, and it can only be accessed within. This can present many challenges for human persons, as they are taught from a very young age that self-worth can only be generated and sustained through a constant flow of external validation in one form or another. The need for this external validation, validation that comes from friends or partners, from money or social status, drives the behavior of most humans. and yet it need not be so. For as we have said, your true value lies within.
But how can we access our true value? Where inside do we look for it?
The first step in accessing the feeling of your true value is in simply acknowledging for yourself that it is there within. Your true value, your true worth, is right there, within your consciousness, within your energy field, within the core of your spiritual essence. That is where it is and that is where it has always been. It is an intrinsic, natural, eternal part of yourself, of who you really are. From our perspective, from the stance of non-physical, there is never any doubt. It is understood and accepted as a given that each and every being in the Universe is incredibly valuable to the process of growth and expansion that lies at the very heart of the Universe. Everyone plays their part and every part is important to the overall mission, so to speak. For most humans, however, the truth of one’s inherent value often hinges upon a question. “Do I have any importance at all? Does my work have any value? Am I good enough, smart enough, nice enough? Do people like me, respect me, honor me? Where exactly does my self-worth lie?” The answers to these types of questions remain mostly hidden from your sight by the fear-based belief systems that permeate the physical plane and cause you, more often than not, to feel unworthy, unloved, less than valued in almost any earthly endeavor that you undertake, let alone the growth and expansion of the Universe. But we can assure you, it is there, your true worth, deep within your soul. And a significant part of the spiritual journey that you and everyone else on your planet has undertaken is becoming aware of and accepting this basic truth about yourself – I AM OF GREAT VALUE TO ALL THAT EXISTS IN THE UNIVERSE. That is an indisputable fact. And that is your truth. It is only a matter of allowing this fact, this truth, into your consciousness.
That is a lot to deal with.
Of course. These ideas that we have been discussing are at the heart of the work that you came to this physical plane to do. To remember who you really are and to then send forth that energy into the physical world, not only to other beings like yourself, but to all that you encounter, all that you experience, all that you create. This is why you must cease your constant search for validation, for praise, for attention and acknowledgement from the outside world, for what you seek is not there. Your true value lies within, and no amount of searching in the outside world will ever fully satisfy your need to experience the truth of who you really are. Only you can do that for yourself and it can only be done from within. So, allow yourself to believe that you alone have the power to summon forth a feeling of your true value, your true worth. Stop relying on others to do this for you and accept, as hard as it might seem, that your worth is beyond question, that you are a glorious creature capable of creating the most magnificent life imaginable for yourself.
It’s still very hard for many of us to accept those kinds of thoughts about ourselves. That we’re worthwhile, that we have value, that we deserve to feel appreciated and loved. Given the current present point of our collective consciousness, the current state of our spiritual evolution, we still tend to fuel our insecurities by defaulting to low-vibrational, fear-based thoughts rather than consciously using affirmations and other resources at our disposal to reinforce the idea that we’re all incredibly gifted beings on the most incredible journey. Which is why, when you tell us to access within ourselves the feeling of our true worth, it’s still not clear to most of us how to do that, how to access that feeling. We’ve spent our lives seeing things the other way around. We’re taught, almost from the moment of our birth, to look outside of ourselves, not just for validation, but for our happiness, our peace of mind, our self-worth. And in the process, we give away all of our power to others, don’t we? The power to make ourselves happy. The power to bring joy into our lives. The power to create everything that we desire.
Bear in mind what we have said before on many occasions: You know how to do this, to connect with who you really are. You have simply forgotten. So, begin by accepting that the process of life, the process of enjoying and valuing life, that all of it, everything that you create and experience, originates within. That is the way things have been designed. Once you can accept this idea, then you can begin to take stock of who you are and where you are. Not with a critical eye, but through the eyes of love. Look around you. What do you see? Do you see success or failure? Do you see sunny skies or dark clouds? Look inside. What do you feel? Do you ever feel happy, really happy, or do you only feel anxiety and fear? These are extreme contrasts, to be sure, but you understand what we mean. You will feel validated when you validate yourself. You will feel worthy when you believe yourself to be worthy. You will feel your own true value when you appreciate who you are and what you have done. So again, look around you. Look inside. What parts of yourself have you neglected? Which of your qualities or accomplishments have gone unnoticed or simply taken for granted by you? Look closely, for every life, no matter how dire or dark, has elements within it that link it to the very best in yourself. Those elements seek only your attention, your acknowledgment, your validation, to rise once again to the surface and regain their rightful place in how you see yourself in the world.
In other words, it’s up to us. If we don’t value ourselves, no one else will.
Indeed. Think of your own recent history. When you left your full-time job a few years ago, you felt as if you had been underappreciated in the work that you had been doing and that those in charge only wanted to get rid of you because they believed that you no longer had anything of value to contribute. While that may have been true from their point of view, you are now starting to realize that, to begin with, those who you felt undervalued your contribution were only acting from what they allowed themselves to see, from their current point of consciousness, which is the only point that they could operate from. You have also begun to realize that whatever you were feeling actually originated within you. It was your choice to feel the way that you did, and blaming others for the situation you found yourself in was simply an attempt on your part to deflect responsibility for your own choices. Now you can see that you felt undervalued because you undervalued yourself. Is this not so?
Yes. It’s hard to admit, but yes, that’s true. At the time, I didn’t think I was making a significant contribution to the company and it’s becoming more and more obvious to me that this is why others treated me that way. That energy started with me and others were merely picking up on that and treating me that way I was treating myself. I guess it really is true what they say, that you get back what you put out.
And where has that realization led you?
To a better understanding of how my energy works in the world, how it can affect the way others treat me, how all of it, all of my experience, begins, as you’ve been saying, within my own energy field, within my own consciousness, deep within my own self. And this realization has led me, despite my ongoing resistance to the idea, has led me to a place of forgiveness towards others for the way I feel I was treated by them. A lesson I hope that I can transfer to other situations in which a similar dynamic is at work – others treating me based on what I’m actually believing about myself. It’s not an easy thing to admit to yourself, but I’m conscious enough to see the value in this kind of realization. For one thing, you become aware of how much of your power you’re giving away to others. And how often you blame others for something that actually originates within yourself. It can get very murky for us humans when we try to unravel all of that, even when we have professional help, but I’m finding out just how essential self-awareness is and how important it is to our own sense of self-worth.
And forgiveness?
Yes, well, forgiveness. Forgiveness remains a challenge, for all of us. A steep one, at times. We seem to have so much resistance to forgiving others for what we see as their transgressions. I wish it was easier for us, but there you are. Still, I’ll admit that once you manage to allow forgiveness in, you feel much lighter as a result, much more at peace with the world, which is preferable to spending your time ruminating on how badly others have treated you. Feels better to let the past go and allow forgiveness in. So much better.
Indeed.
This has been a very enlightening and uplifting conversation. I think we will stop there for today.
As you wish. Until next time then.
Thank you all.
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